Vacation Rules
2004-01-06, 2:24 p.m.

There are things that I think are necessary parts of a proper vacation. Here they are:

� You must eat dessert after every meal. Even breakfast. Purchase a box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts to have on hand for breakfast desserts.

� You must see at least one movie while on vacation. At the theater.

� You must get a pedicure or some other spa treatment while on vacation. Multiple treatments are even better.

� You must read magazines and/or books. For fun. No work-related stuff allowed.

� You must have sex, preferably lots of it and even more preferably with another person. That lesbian �we consider all kinds of things making love� doesn�t cut it either. I mean full on genital contact with an orgasm involved. At least for me. If you don�t want one, that�s your business.

� You must buy one cheap, tacky refrigerator magnet to commemorate your trip. Anything else you buy should be neither cheap nor tacky.

� Buy postcards of whatever �view� you want so you�re not disappointed if your photos don�t come out right. Unless you�re a professional photographer because then you�d probably be too ashamed to buy postcards for that reason.

� You must leave your planner at home. Your Palm Pilot is questionable. I only take mine because its case is also my wallet but I rarely carried around anything more than a credit card and drivers license.

� You must eat in at least one funky restaurant, one cheap down home style restaurant and, if you can find one, one really cool restaurant where you have to somewhat dress up.

� Dressing up should just include not wearing a swimsuit and thongs. The kind for your feet, fool, not the underwear kind.

� If you have a mate and can get them to buy you a piece of jewelry so much the better.

� Vacation is no excuse for the socks with sandals thing unless you have a blister and those are your only comfortable shoes.

Those are my simple rules for vacation life. If you are interested in Florida Vacation Part 2, today�s actual entry, it�s here